The Cat's out of the Bag

I mentioned previously that I was afraid to tell my bosses at work that I am expecting. During my first week of office training, I swore I heard something along the lines of a pregnant woman being turned away... as it turns out, I guess I was just paranoid. There is a saying in Spanish, "el sordo no oye pero compone", translating to “the deaf man can’t hear, but he can make it up.” I was so focused on my testing/training and worried that I wouldn't get hired because I was pregnant that I guess I heard what I wanted to hear... you know how that goes. Well it turns out some people from work had already found out but that's life in a small town. Unfortunately word got out on Facebook, It apparently was one of my mom's acquaintances since I don't know anyone in town, nor did I tell anyone. Well you know people... they like to talk. I was more than furious, I will say though, if I wasn't pregnant, I would really give this town something to talk about. Anyhow, my bosses were fine with it, so they said. They expressed to me everything was OK, thankfully, it was. I felt so dumb after the fact, I went into talk to my boss after our weekly meeting and I started tearing up in the office lol. It's the hormones. I hate that I am more emotional that ever. I'm just glad I don't have anything hanging over my head anymore. Work continues to go well. I wish I was better/more efficient at the paperwork but I know that all comes in due time.


Speaking of due time... going on 25 weeks. 15 weeks and 2 days to go Wow! Time sure goes by fast, I just wish I could enjoy it more rather than being worried all the time. We started to shop a little, mostly for baby shower stuff and it's pretty exciting. I bought some baby shoes and a little onsie, oh, and a couple of blankies. I think I will definitely wait till later to do more shopping. The idea of having a baby is finally starting to set in but I'm still a little in denial lol. I guess it really wont hit me till he's here. I think calling him by his name is definitely helping... Matthew... Music to my ears <3 <3 <3 Heartburn has become my worst enemy. Everything and I mean EVERYTHING gives me heartburn even water. UGH! There's an old wives's tale that if you get a lot of heartburn, the baby will have lots of hair when it's born. Well, I don't know about that but time will tell. Tum's and I and BFF's these days. Baby's moving around a lot. Especially when my mom barges into my room, shakes my belly and starts singing to him. He is definitely a lot like me so far, he is up late and likes to sleep in but since I have to wake up early for work... well, let's just say we're both not happy campers. I finally got my 4-D sonogram. If that wasn't the most beautiful sight I have ever seen, I don't know what is. When I see the image, I can see two different things, one with his profile, mouth closed and then another with the mouth open and slightly higher with a tiny nose between the his eyes (the second option is kind of scary... so Ill just go with the first one where his mouth is closed) They didn't exactly tell me, and well, I didn't exactly ask, I was just so happy to see him. He had his hand tucked under his chin (just not in the picture) ADORABLE! What can I say? That's my baby. So he is definitely a boy and I couldn't be happier. I just need to sit back and enjoy the rest of this pregnancy instead of being such a hypochondriac. The specialist looked at all his organs and said so far good. They want to monitor his heart closely so, I have another appointment with the specialist in a month and with my regular OB, in two weeks. I saw his kidneys, his the four chambers in his heart, his brain, his spine, feet, and hands. The doctor said his foot was over his head (wow his is just as limber as me lol, well I'm not so much these days). When the specialist took over, this little baby boy gave him a hard time. He moved too much at my 7 week sono to get a good measurement, he moved way too much at my 10 week sono (the doctor almost gave up, but after 50 minutes of pushing on my full bladder and almost having an accident, we got his measurements), When we found out his sex, he didn't want to cooperate, and yet again with this appointment. Mom says he is shy, I say he is just as stubborn as I am... Lord help me!


While I couldn't be happier that I'm having a baby, I am starting to feel self-conscious, something I RARELY had an issue with. I am gaining way too much weight. I don't fit in any pre-pregnancy clothes so I went maternity clothes shopping a while back. I thought it would be a good idea to get some maternity underwear. I spent 45 bucks on new panties and I HATE THEM! Motherhood sure has expensive stuff and the quality is not so good, In my opinion. I like that the pants cinch at the waist (when I'm not wearing them) so it looks as if my waist is the width of my leg (makes me feel good lol), and then there are the maternity underwear. My new underwear look like parachutes :-/ Why cant they have that cool elastic thing around the waist too? As it is I already have a complex about my weight gain. My face looks fatter, I feel like I have three necks, my feet feel like they have grown a size, I cant see my crotch, and my thighs rub together now (not good). We all know what happens when your thighs rub... yup, chaffing. I think it's a combination of thunder thighs and my new horrible underwear. It just baffles me that Motherhood cant even make seamless underwear. They literally feel like the .99 cent panties on the clearance rack at Walmart, CHEAP. Anyhow, Mom and I went to Tractor Supply Company and Guess what I saw... Lady Anti Monkey Butt LOL

I thought it was the funniest thing ever and I just had to try it out, it's for chaffing and has calamine lotion but in a silky, powdery form. It smells nice lol. I was going to get the KY anti-chaffing/silkening lotion but I saw this one first. It was this, or not wearing any panties at all. I think I'd rather wear underwear, besides I don't want to give Paris Hilton and Lindsey Lohan competition. I'd win hands down... Just saying. lol. So we'll see how this powder goes.

TEARS OF JOY

Yesterday (4-14-2011) probably has been the best and worst day of my life... OK, so I tend to exaggerate a bit (JUST A BIT) but it definitely was the best day of my life. I had been anticipating my prenatal visit with my new maternal-fetal specialist for over a month. My mother and I got off of work early so we could make my 1430 appointment. I could hardly sleep the night before and I wasn't sure if I should be anxious or elated... anxious because at my last appointment I had blood work for Down's-Syndrome screening for the baby (who wouldn't be nervous about that?) I get to my appointment just to be told the MFS did not make it in for the week. He comes from Austin, Tx two days out of the month. My heart sank and my claws came out. we had just driven about 40 minutes to get to my doctor's office and I hadn't received a call at home nor to my cell. I understand the clerk was just the messenger, but I just about ate her up and spit her out. I said I had driven all that way and I demanded to see someone. All she could say was sorry and I had a smart ass response for every excuse she had. I kinda made a scene (but only the people in line could hear, I don't raise my voice). I spoke to the manager, (I was just about to spit the "I am gonna have a BF and write a letter" line from White Chicks. Due to the high risk nature of my pregnancy, I am supposed to get seen every two weeks. As it is, I had already gone a month without being seen. So needless to say I got my way, I got to see my baby despite the fact that my blood pressure went up to 140, that is pretty high. I started to shake from anger and frustration and as soon as they said, "go have a seat and we will call you in, we fit you in", I started to cry... 'cause I'm a big baby and that's how I deal with my emotions. I gave up on finding out the sex and just faced the fact that I probably had to wait another two weeks. As soon as I heard my baby's heartbeat I felt at ease. I had a heart to heart with my regular OB and my mom said we were so excited to find out the sex only to be disappointed. He said will that make you happy, we both said YES!!! :D. And of course I started to cry again... I suppose I could blame all the crying on the pregnancy hormones but I'd only be kidding myself, I've always been the emotional one LOL. We didn't get a detailed sono but we got to find out the sex... they even gave my mom a pic too! Well... WE'RE HAVING A BOY!!! I couldn't be any happier... and of course I cried again, and again, and again LOL.

On another note... I just got home about 30 minutes ago with my "new to me" car. No more hopping in to the passenger seat rolling around to get to the driver's side with a pregnant belly scraping my elbows on the upholstery. My car is little, nothing fancy, but it will get me too and from work, does great on gas, I don't have to enter the passenger's side, it's been very well maintained, and I can go on and on, but the best perk is NO PAYMENT! I paid it all up front. I used up all my savings so I've got about 80 bucks left to get me through. Luckily they filled up my tank so I'm good to go. Oh yeah... so today was my first pay day and my direct deposit hasn't kicked in yet, unfortunately, that means I have to wait for my check to come in the mail. Boohoohoo for me. I was so ready to go shopping.

The Worst Week EVER!!!

So much has gone on this week and well, part of last week. For starters we all (our household) got sick. It started with my mother having a respiratory virus that turned into a full blown sinus infection. It hit her pretty bad she missed an entire week of work. I don't think she has EVER missed a week of work, OK, well except for when she had her spinal fusion last January. She finally started feeling better when I started feeling bad. It began with post nasal drip causing a sore throat and then the symptoms hit me all at once. I pretty much spent the whole weekend in bed, the one symptom I didn't get was loss of appetite. I was kinda hoping for that one LOL (not really). I still wasn't feeling well so I called in on Monday, yup... two weeks into my new job and I already called in sick. Let me tell you though, I seriously needed it. And so the cycle continues... Now that I am feeling better (sort of) my step dad is as sick as a dog... LITERALLY! Men are such babies LOL. But on a serious note, he is pretty sick. I just hope this passes soon so I can take him for his "Dino-Steak" with my first pay check, he took me so I guess now it's my turn to treat lol. So on top of being sick, now my truck happens to be quite pissed off at me. My truck and I have this awesome relationship. She hardly gives me any problems except for being a gas guzzler. I consider her my life saver. With my driving track record and all the vehicles I've totalled, this is the one that has lasted me the longest... besides, I feel safe. It's like a train. Cold, semi-shiny metal (She last lost most of her luster LOL) and compared to all these fiberglass vehicles, I feel safe. I've had this truck for many years now and I have a hard time parting with her. "Her" or "Him" whatever, I think men give me more problems so I consider my truck a "her". Anyhow... with this new job and driving about a 100+ miles a day and with gas quickly rising to $4 a gallon, I am considering getting a small economical car. I wasn't planning on going and getting myself into debt, just something to get me through the year until my baby comes... then on to bigger and better things. I must say... I WASN'T EVEN CONSIDERING GETTING RID OF MY TRUCK... besides, who knows when you need a second vehicle, or a truck for that matter. Anyhow, my aunt told me about a car her friend has for sale so I drove over to my aunt's house and waited for her friend to get out of work. You wouldn't believe what happened... I was walking to my truck to go check out this car and my door will not open... ARE YOU FREAKIN' KIDDING ME??? It's stuck, and I mean, I can force it open but I will really mess up the body, the door is rubbing on the front fender or whatever you call it (as you can see I'm not a mechanic therefore I don't know parts, except for the ones I really need to know). I'm apparently the only one who appreciates my truck. My mom and brother are embarassed to be seen in it. They call it the "mojo" truck. It's a derogatory term used to describe Mexicans who cross the river. Anyway, I'll spare the details... And I'm Hispanic, Mexican, whatever you wanna call me, so yes, I can use the term. Anyways... so now I have to get into my truck through the passenger side... now that's ghetto. LOL, I'm actually quite embarrassed now. So now more than ever I want this car because I don't want to be seen climbing in and out of the passenger's side and sliding over to the driver's side all because my freakin' truck is pissed off at me for going to look at another vehicle. Now that's a bitch! lol. If climbing in and out like that isn't bad enough, try adding a baby bump. Not fun!

So as if all that wasn't bed enough, today has had to be the worst day in my entire nursing career. I've been up to my elbows in shit, literally... and I'm a nurse so I could handle it. I've seen blood and guts, and smelled things I wouldn't wish anyone to smell... melena is pretty bad, and so is gangrene. Anyway, so I'm starting to spread my wings with the company and instead of shadowing I get to do patient visits now with supervision of course. I was forewarned about the living conditions of this patient. Her home is pretty much condemned and APS has been called several times but they don't do anything. Her home is INFESTED with roaches. There are four dogs living in the home that are never taken out so they do their business on the carpet. The home smells horrible, I almost gagged... and that's cause my sinuses are stuffed and my breathing is compromised. It was horrible. With in two or three minutes of stepping into her home, roaches fall on me from the ceiling... one fell in my blouse and into my bra. I tried so hard to maintain my composure and not scream while trying to get these bugs off of me. The other nurse helped me but I couldn't find the one that landed in my bra. Sorry bug, I don't plan on taking you home and buying you a diamond leash and keeping you as my pet. I DON'T THINK SO! I had the heebie jeebies all day, I felt itchy and felt critters crawling all over me. We pulled into a gas station where I ran to the bathroom and stripped to shake off my clothes. I never found the roach so I still feel the crawlies all over me. GROSS! This week is not even half way done yet but there is only one thing that will make this week so work it... TWO MORE DAYS UNTIL MY SONO!

Oh Baby!

10 days and counting till I get to see my little one again, hopefully on a 4d sonogram. I'm keeping my fingers crossed this baby wont be as stubborn as I am and give me a little peep show so we can find out the gender. I am sooo excited I've been counting down since my last appointment. I've come to realize the more I count down, the longer the wait is. What is helping is that I get to work now, so that means I am not at home bored all day and my mind is occupied. Everyone apparently says this baby is a girl... I say, "who knows". Perhaps it's time for another girl. I'm surrounded by boys... all the great grand children on my paternal side are boys except for Miah... and on my maternal side... Damn... there are too many grandchildren to count, forget counting the great grand children lol, I lost track years ago... but there are lots of boys. I honestly don't care, this baby is a gift, and boy or girl, I am grateful. All I can pray for is a healthy baby with ten fingers and ten little toes.

I've finally reached the half way mark... 21 weeks today and little by little I am starting to "feel" pregnant. Aside from the weight gain, I've managed to grow cankles... Oh Joy! As much as I have to run to the bathroom, I'm surprised there is enough fluid to stay in my legs and feet. Fortunately, blood pressure is good so no problems there. I hadn't had any swelling so I think the culprit was that half bag of pistachios I ate... which also gave me my first bout of pregnancy induced heartburn. Indigestion really sucks :-/

Work is going great. Since I still haven't mentioned I'm expecting, bathroom trips during ride alongs can get really tricky. Fortunately I've been with two nurses who pee just as much as I do. We literally make a potty break after every patient visit... yay for me! I don't know what their excuses are since they are roughly my age, but I blame mine on the tea... ;) Speaking of bathroom urgencies... Why is it that every time we go have family dinner and my step father drives, he ALWAYS makes a detour? AND I MEAN ALWAYS. I know the urgencies can come on rather quickly so I ask before we leave, "are we going straight home"? The answer is always yes and then he decides to take a scenic route when the baby decides my bladder is a trampoline. Men! I just about wet my pants and I was one more bump in the dirt road from asking him to stop so I could pop a squat.

Speaking of bouncing baby... This little body high-jacker is quite the "Ultimate Lightweight Championship kick boxer". I love to just feel him or her move inside of me. While it feels like an alien body snatcher has invaded my uterus, I can just sit or lay in awe while it karate chops away. How can something so small (about 10 inches head to toe and about 11 oz) be so strong? I can already feel some of the movements when I place my hand on my abdomen. I don't know about other babies but mine is probably gonna be the next super hero LOL ;)

As far as other pregnancy symptoms, I cant really complain. I can eat apples now and actually enjoy them (anyone who knows me, knows I HATED apples unless they were chamomanzanas- apples coated in chamoy candy). I cant say I "crave" them but I can see one, eat it, and enjoy it. My mom apparently has the munchies... She eats a lot of Cheetos LOL. Smells don't bother me so I can pretty much eat anything... but sometimes I'll pass on meat if it's in a soup or something. I am actually concerned about my weight gain, I suppose I should start exercising even though I say I am going to start every day, and I don't ;(. This next doctor's appointment will have elapsed a period of a month between visits. Usually my visits are every two weeks, I guess Doc thought I was doing well. So I've been dwelling on my weight gain. During one of our bathroom breaks today, I saw a scale... it said I lost twenty pounds. What a waste of a quarter. I knew it was impossible. I had to make a Wal-mart run today so I went to the scale isle and weigh myself. Bad news... I gained too much. Sheesh. It's impossible to only gain 15 pounds during 9 months when you're hungry all the time. I am seriously hoping I get a late case of "all day sickness" so I can lose a couple pounds lol. JK. I'm not a bulimic but it sounded good for a moment. OK, it really didn't but I guess I should really start exercising. Blah. If it's best for the baby, it shouldn't be that much to sacrifice.

I'm hoping the rest of this pregnancy goes well. Ive had minor complications and have a long road ahead of me still but with a few sacrifices, I hope for the best.