The Joys of Aging... And Mom's gonna kill me

So my mom and I were having a snack at the table the other evening (BTW She is gonna be sooooo mad I'm writing about this ;) tehehe AND NO THIS ISNT ABOUT HER AGING) and she decides to review her mail. She received this catalog that she had never received before called Dr. Leonard's... She was all excited cause it sort of looks like a fingerhut or ABC catalog, sort of. Anyhow I asked... "Mom, Why are you receiving that catalog? That's for old people and the old lady that my Grandma Melda used to work for would give her her left over catalogs... so she would just take them home and throw them away." They have some purposeful items that caught my attention like an orthopedic dog bed and coat. Anyways... So my mom is flipping through the pages content with what she sees. She says, "WOW! reading glasses so cheap... And WOW!!! that's a really nice bed spread... And OH!!!! Gibby (my step dad) could really uses those (Prolly some slippers or robe or something)". So she's all excited and I'm thinking to myself... OMG! I cant believe my mom is looking at a catalog for old people. So she flips the page and screams... AHHH! stares at it for half a second and flips the page. She is completely red and I'm like, "What was that?" so she turns the page back to show me. lol I start laughing hysterically. All I could say in my most serious voice was, "Well, old people need action too!... and sometimes when men get old, they don't function properly". She looks at my with this face and says "Shut up" lol. So she proceeds to flip through the catalog... Again, she turns completely red and starts laughing... flips the page again and another page of personal massagers and products. She slams the catalog shut in disbelief. It was too funny.

Personally, I don't think there is anything wrong with old people getting it on... I mean, they need some lovin' too and I hope at that age I haven't lost my sex drive lol. So Lesson Learned...

(Actual Image from Dr. Leonard's Catalog)

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On another note...

Mom had a discectomy and fusion last January and is slowly but surely recovering. Unfortunately she still endures a lot of spinal and nerve pain. The weather change (rain and chilly) flared up her pain. I'm in my room filling out some online job applications when she comes to my mom. "Bibis... Can you rub some muscle cream on my back?" I get the tube and squeeze a generous amount of cream on to my palm, rub my hands together to warm it up, and proceed to giving her a mini massage. The only thing I think of to my self is... "Wow, this stuff doesn't smell like muscle cream... I guess it's unscented". So I'm done with her massage and she is watching TV on my bed and is rubbing her legs with cream. I'm still at my desk filling out applications and rubbed my face with left over residue of cream after I had washed my hands. She yells... "What! this isn't muscle cream. So I turn around and much to my surprise it is definitely not muscle cream. I suppose as a nurse before we administer any medication or topical lotions/ointments we double check what we are administering... I just assumed my mom got the right cream. I guess she had picked up some anti fungal cream that my step dad had in a drawer and not the muscle cream. Gibby yells from the living room... "I have the muscle cream over here". Well as they say... If you ASSUME you make and ASS out of U and ME. So mom practically had anti-fungal cream all over her body while I was rubbing it on my face lol. Lesson learned... Remember nursing rules... Right dose, Right route, Right medication, Right patient... etc, etc... AND

Baby Bumps and Badonkydonks

After three long weeks of waiting to see my new doctor the time has finally come... well almost. I have my appointment on Thursday and I couldn't be more excited! Too bad I couldn't get seen sooner for that horrendous poison oak (I can only assume) rash I had all over my abdomen for two and a half weeks... THAT WAS HORRIBLE! All the nurses could recommend was Benadryl and hydrocortizone cream. After two days of practically feeling knocked out by the Benadryl, I pretty much stopped since the rash wasn't going away and I pretty much figured out it wasn't an allergic reaction. I treated myself with every possible cream in the first aid section but what worked the best was Caladryl and Sarna lotion. But fortunately the rash has cleared and all I have left is a patch of dry skin where the rash was, no biggie compared to the intense itching. Time is flying by so fast and although I still worry, I am not as apprehensive as I was before. I'm now in my second trimester and hoping the baby's sex can be determined. I keep getting asked if I want a boy or a girl... truth of the matter is, I just want a healthy baby. It still feels surreal, like an out of body experience... I know it's happening but it doesn't feel like it's happening to me. Guess I'm still in denial but ready or not, here this baby comes.


There are so many old wives's tales that determine the sex of the baby... I tried the Chinese gender calendar, two actually... one where you input some information and another that's an actual calendar... one said boy one said girl... Uh OK. My BFFs friend did some numerology thing and she said I was having a boy. My grandma said I'm probably having a girl since my cousin's little boy practically has a love/hate relationship with me. He's only two and wants me around but when I'm there, he kicks and hits me. My mom says it's a girl also since apparently I have a big ass now and have gained so much weight :-/ I don't over eat and stick to my diet 98% of the time... I give in to my mom's yummy cornbread... What? Don't judge! lol. Either way I'll be happy with whatever God gives me. So as much as I try to hide behind loose clothes and my rapid weight gain, I must admit I have a baby bump... although you really cant tell cause I'm extra fluffy these days. I'm sure the Dr. is gonna have me on some serious fridge lock down and exercise but that's OK since Doc knows what's best for my sweet pea. And did I mention... this ignorant Mexican lady totally pissed me off. She said I got super duper fat and asked if I was having triplets. WTF! I know she wasn't serious about me having three but she just wanted to put me down. My Spanish isn't so well that I can defend myself but if you could only imagine the English words that ran through my mind.

Aside from all that I feel good, I don't even feel pregnant yet... OK so I have to pee all the time, especially at night which is REALLY annoying, I get out of breath easily which only means I need to start exercising more, and I've gained weight in places I never thought I would... like my ass. So having a bigger butt has it's perks but not when you're still trying to fit in the last two pair of jeans you have left. I've out grown all my pants except for two pair of jeans that fit me big before I found out I was pregnant and my sweats which is very depressing. I think when we go to town for my doctor's appointment on Thursday (which is an hour away) I'm gonna hit up some stores and buy some maternity clothes. I swore up and down that I would never wear them... Oh well, I want some jeans and at this point I don't really care. Just taking this one day at a time. I sometimes think I can feel the baby move, which makes this feel more real... but then I think... maybe it's just gas... And while that is a little TMI, it's totally natural even when you're not pregnant... Besides, I'm also now the Queen of Belching. Yup... it's pretty gross and I really don't care... unless I'm in public. Oh yeah... So I was saying I had no symptoms and here I am listing them all lol, I guess I meant the major ones. Sleep has become my best friend these days... That's all I wanna do. I wake up at 8 or 9 to have a bowl of Cheerios for breakfast and I'm still sleepy so all I wanna do is crawl back into bed. Lunch time comes around and I get sleepy... at 4 I'm ready for another nap. Most days, I avoid the naps but I seriously need them... Just call me Sleeping Beauty. ;)

Snow time

I can finally say I know what a real winter feels like. Back home (I'm originally from deep south Texas), it's cold (60 degrees) one day and scorching hot the next day. Only in the Valley can you get a sun tan in the winter... actually all year round. Back home a cold front (70 degrees and below) means grab a light sweater or jacket and don't forget your flip-flops cause by noon time, it's time to take off the sweater. Now that I've relocated to North Texas, we actually have seasons. I got to experience freezing weather (Actually, so did the Valley... I think it's cause the Valley really missed me) and while I've seen snow once in my life several years before, this was what I've been waiting for.
We got about 5-6 inches of snow, which is nothing compared to many parts of the country, but it was enough to get me excited. It was around 10 or 11 pm last night when we noticed that it was snowing. I ran outside to take a quick look and I was in heaven. I felt like "Kim Boggs" in "Edward Scissorhands" dancing under the falling snow... OK, so in my case there was no Edward shaving ice... and it only lasted literally three seconds because I had my mom yelling, "Get inside, you're gonna get sick"! So that was a major party crasher for me but considering I cant afford to get sick, I suppose she was right. I woke up with excitement... like Christmas day excitement. The light shined through my window, only much brighter. The sun, although barely shining, radiated off the snow and illuminated my room. I had such a big smile on my face... but when I realized it was so cold the dog didn't even want to go outside to do her business, I kinda figured I'd stay inside myself and observe the beauty from with in the comfort of our warm and cozy home. After a while, I gathered the courage to endure the cold. I threw on my boots, gloves, scarf, and jacket. I felt so bundled up, I waddled like a penguin from all those layers... It was still cold but I managed to gasp at the sight. I was ready to roll on the ground and make a snow angel, but the dogs changed my mind. They started playing and somehow got snow on my face. Ummm, Scratch that. Forget the snow angel if that means I have lay on the ground and get cold... Needless to say, later in the day, I'd be laying in the snow.
We stayed inside most of the day. I know, I know, my second experience with snow and I'm not having fun. I'm also not a five year old and my immune system isn't exactly prepared for me to get sick. We went out to run a few errands in town. I decided to look cute rather than sensible for this weather. I opted for some boots that had no grip instead of my cowgirl boots (What??? It's rare we go into town and you never know who you're gonna meet. I just had to look cute! Don't judge lol) Anyway, we were still on the property and I got off to open the main gait... I walked less than 6 ft before I slipped/flew on my back. It happened so sudden, I didn't have time to think lol. When I realized what happened I didn't know if I should cry or laugh, so I did a little of both. I was mostly scared, I feared for my baby's safety. My mom got out shocked and worried but she did manage to get a few laughs in as well. We were all concerned... but I'm sure I'll be fine. I'm more than positive this is going to be a very interesting winter season.