Lost in the Wilderness

So I've been M.I.A. lately. I've seriously had thousands of ideas for new blogs only I've been SUPER lazy. If I hadn't updated y'all yet, I was re accepted back into the nursing program (For those that don't know, I should have graduated in October but i failed my last class with a 74 ;( and had to wait out a semester) Hopefully by the end of spring semester I will be Cyn, R.N. The holidays were great. This was the first year in a long time that I was able to spend the Christmas with both parents (not together, they're divorced, but saw them both on the same day) It was nice especially because dad's birthday is on Christmas day even though he gets really grouchy. Mom was kinda out of it when I saw her, she had to pop some pain killers due to her degenerative spine disease in C-5, C-6, and C-7 vertebrae, which has now been corrected with ACD (Anterior Cervical Discectomy surgery. In a nutshell, they removed bone from her right iliac crest (hip bone), an incision was made on her throat to gain access to the anterior (front) of the spine, moved everything aside, inserted the bone fragments into the spine to relieve severe pain and pressure, then fused with a titanium plate. Check out the link to see a quick clip of the procedure (No, that is not mom). The surgery was on Wednesday, mom was released yesterday and is now at home recovering. AMEN!!! I was literally two seconds away from an anxiety attack till we got an update from the doc saying mom was fine and on her way up to recovery. My heart was pounding and skipping beats, my hands were shaking, and I was very nauseated, I hated thinking that something might go wrong but for some reason those thoughts just popped into my head, I'm guessing it's because the last time I was at the hospital, my grammy passed away. I'm not quite sure if she'll be able to move her head back since I didn't get to talk to the doctor (all the arrangements were made with out me here so no body was able to be advocate for mom). She is in a lot of pain but being tough and walking around using a walker.

So while mom recovers and I nurse her back to health, I get to enjoy my mini vacay here at the ranch. I love coming out here. I guess you can say I'm recovering too, I have had a seriously stressful couple of months. I get to enjoy beautiful sunsets, walk the woods (which I haven't taken pictures of yet, but once I do I'll post em), and just be surrounded by my loving family. I especially miss grandpa, I haven't left him since grams passed away but my Aunt Faith is there at home with him. I miss her too! I usually leave Troy (my dog) with grandpa when I go out of town but he had a seizure the day before I left, I decided to take him with me since I was going to be gone for about three weeks. He loves it out here too, he has the freedom to run around, experience new sights, sounds, and smells. The day after mom's surgery my step dad took him out and their dog Roper took him out into the woods and left him. My step dad spent two hours looking for him. Thank God he was found! After Noah, my Maltese, disappeared I was heart broken, I don't know what I would have done if Troy was lost too.

The only thing that sucks about the area is my cell phone doesn't get reception unless I stand in one of a few spots in the house for a long time or we're in town, which is about 15 minutes away. I haven't really talked to "manfriend" much since I've been out here but he understands, and he has got some stuff of his own going on. So I actually kinda opened up to him about my feelings (I didn't exactly say the "L" word) which is completely out of character for me, at the same time I start to wonder if perhaps I said too much. I meant to say what I said, so no regrets. I just often wonder if I'm only fooling myself that we could actually be happy together since things are kind of complicated. AND NO HE IS NOT MARRIED OR WITH ANOTHER WOMAN (At least not that I know of HA! lol JK)! GEEZ! lol.

Oh yeah, I almost forgot it's officially the new year! HAPPY NEW YEAR! I hope everyone had a safe and wonderful celebration. I passed out at 8:30 pm since I only got a couple hours of sleep at the hospital and the recliner was very uncomfortable. So no tequila shots or goblet of wine for me, but there was no where else I'd rather be. I have a couple new year's resolutions I think I wanna try. One of them of course is a healthy life style change. I freakin' say that every year and never go through with it. BUT I REALLY WANNA DO IT! I guess I just really want to re-evaluate my life and see what other changes I need to make. I just really want to be happy! I don't think that is too much to ask for. I think I deserve it.

OK, I guess that's it for now. I'll leave you with some beautiful pics of the ranch! Enjoy!

Cinderella Incarnate/ Tribute to Manfriend

This blog has been in the works for like... 2 weeks now, I just never got around to finishing it.

It all started last, last Saturday (yeah... that's 2 Saturdays ago) which I spent with my dad and how I firmly believe that I am Cinderella Incarnate. Yep, I even have the evil step mother to prove it. OK... so I'm not a slave and she isn't evil but I like to think so sometimes. I asked my "manfriend" to put my face on Cinderella since I suck at photoshop (he didn't know it was for my blog). The picture below is what he came up with... We were talking on the phone when he starts laughing, actually he was chuckling (it was so cute how his little laugh made me laugh, but he didn't need to know that) so I'm like WTF is so funny? He said he just finished the picture and how he did such an awesome job and how he cracks himself up. I was like, "You better not have used an F'd up picture of me!". He emailed it to me... OK so I laughed too once I saw it. Actually... what I meant was if he could put my lovely face on the poor slave Cinderella not the princess (guess I didn't make myself clear), so it would fit the story line. This is what he came up with.

What a banana! Yup... Can you believe that Prince Charming is totally overshadowing Cinderella? Oh HELL NO! My Prince Charming is looking like a thug donning bubble gum wrapper grilz, cuz he cool like dat while Cinderella is suffering from shrunken head syndrome. I look cute though, I must admit lol (I like the pic anyway... It's way cute and he put a lot of thought into it lol). Anyhow... since the picture is obviously about him and not ME, I decided I'd use the picture even though he didn't know it would be available for everyone to see. So since I lost my mojo for the Cinderella blog, this is what it evolved into...

Tribute to MANFRIEND

(Yeah... this is him, I don't think these are too recent... It's hard to find some pics of him not goofing around)

Let me tell you a little about my "manfriend"...

He's addicted to porn and he masturbates constantly...PILLOW FIGHT!! HA HA HA! I'm just kidding, it's actually a quote from one of the BESTEST movies of ALL time (IMO), Sorority Boys. Actually the original quote says "I" instead of "he", so I obviously I changed it around. If you've seen it, you'll get it. I dubbed him "Grilz Charming and Prince Grilz" (I'd hope I wouldn't have to go into that after what was mentioned above) along with many other pet names I came up for him, but you don't need to know those. He has been anxiously awaiting this blog. Actually, once I told him about the Cinderella blog and how I was gonna post the lovely picture up anyway he got super stoked and then I told him I was gonna dedicate an entire blog to him, he was like OH, OK COOL! He was trying to be modest but I know he was shouting with excitement on the inside; He likes the attention... So every time I post a new blog (OK so it's been like three since I told him) he's like YAAY! until I break the news to him and tell him its not the one, then he's like Oh, ;( So where was I before I got distracted? (Remember I cant help the ADD... Just deal with it, it's not that hard to follow along) Oh yeah! I was mentioning some of my manfriend's qualities. OK... Well we obviously know he's a jokester, hence the picture. I can always count on him to make me smile when I'm feeling down. He is down to earth, a SWEETHEART (even though he tries to make a joke out of everything; Go figure!), musically and artistically inclined. Yes, he serenades me with his guitar and Digeridoo. Be jealous, BE VERY JEALOUS. OK so the digeriedoo is not quite romantic but at least I get a few laughs out of it. I hate that we live 1500 miles apart. His picture hung on "our" (ummmm. How do I put this... let's just leave it as mine and an ex) living room wall for two and a half years, so it almost seemed like fate when we started "talking". Basically, he is everything a chick could ask for. He is even "The nice guy" I didn't think existed this day in age. So there you have it ladies and gentlemen, and of course, my manfriend, who has been anxiously waiting by his "crackberry" to read my blog about himself.